«Sometimes I have the impression that my sister Giulia sets is here with me. I know it’s not possible, but I feel it close. The pain is still strong. The death of a person you love is not overcome, especially if it happened in such a violent way. All the more if you find yourself having to fight for justice ». Chiara Tramontano It is Giulia’s sister, the seven -month pregnant young man massacred with thirty -seven stab wounds in Senago, in the province of Milan, by his partner, the former barman Alessandro Impignatiello That, after killing her, first tried to burn the corpse and then dismissed it by hiding it in an area behind some boxes.
When he was killed, Giulia was twenty -nine years old and had already prepared the bedroom for the child who was waiting for, Thiago. In recent days, the assassin’s lawyers have presented Appeal against the first instance sentence: they will try to cancel the accusations of premeditation and cruelty to save him the prison for life. «The only thing I can say is that I have never seen a process that, between the first instance and the last degree, terms with the same judgment. There is always a penalty discount, “says Chiara Tramontano, «If there has been justice, I will be able to say it only in twenty years, and only if the killer will still be in prison. Maybe in the meantime it will have come out of the jail for good conduct or for another reason, he will be fifty years old and can make up for a lifetime. My sister, on the other hand, is underground and my parents’ lives is destroyed ».
At first instance, Impignatiello was sentenced to life imprisonment.
“How right it is. The opposite would have been absurd, given the brutality of what he did. First the attempts to poison it, then the stab wounds, the suppression of the corpse. When the judges read the sentence, I didn’t feel grateful, because I knew that was just a goal. The only thing for which I am grateful is the introduction of the crime of femicide punished with life imprisonment when committed as an act of discrimination or hatred towards the offended person as a woman. Perhaps, my sister’s death has also served this. But as long as other women continue to die, my pain will not end ».
How do you survive such a tragedy?
“You can’t. There is no school to overcome the pain, nobody has the secret. My family is devastated. My giant pain is nothing compared to that of my parents. Mom says they suffer more, that she kept her in her womb. But I will probably live much more than her, my pain will last longer. Meanwhile, I will have to fight two battles, because on the one hand I have to survive. You cannot let yourself go, you cannot die: it would mean adding pain to pain, and therefore my life must start again. This is why I moved outside Italy, to try to rebuild myself in a place where nobody knows who they are, nobody on the street recognizes me and looks at me with my eyes full of punishment. But my life has been completely distorted. There is no longer the frivolity of the past, and I stopped being a “daughter” ».
In what sense?
«My parents now need me, I feel this responsibility. I find myself making decisions, like when I had to choose the color of Giulia’s coffin. Life is a daily struggle between the desire to find a way of moving forward and the difficulty of my parents to continue living when they think they have nothing to celebrate, that their life no longer makes sense. The concept of being children is lost, you find yourself doing things that you would never have done before. My days are marked by phone calls with my mother who is desperate, or call where I am told that my parents spent the day at the cemetery. And if you have a problem, if you would have searched for advice before, now you tell you that it is better not to afflict them, because adding another weight to their pain would be a little crushed. “
Meanwhile, life goes on, the days spend …
«And my pain remains giant, while I try not to feel guilty in going ahead while my parents remain behind. Because then there are many moments in which I do something, maybe a journey, and I realize that my life flows. Their no, because for them now the only place to stay is sitting in front of Giulia’s plaque ».
You have also written on social networks that, in her own way, will have twenty -seven years forever.
“Yes, because they are the only ones we spent together and that I will want to remember from here on.”
What relationship did he have with Giulia?
«She was born two years before me, we were practically peers. Ours was an in several phases. As often happens between sisters, there have also been conflicts, differences in views. But we have faced together almost all the stages of adolescence and then of life to follow. Same school, same teachers. At high school there was the real first separation, because we followed two different paths. “
Giulia how was it? What do you remember about her?
«We were characteristicly very different. I practice, with my feet always on the ground. For Giulia the feelings of the people he loved – friends, relatives, even his partner – came before hers. He was extremely sensitive and, if he had conflicts with friends or with his boyfriend, he faced them with a chest, like an emotional, non -rational person. This often collided with my way of being. In fact, in becoming adults, the roles have almost reversed: my pragmatic being almost made me become the older sister. Between the two, I was the lucid mind, the one that had to analyze the problem and always found a solution. Giulia, on the other hand, was a free spirit, much more than I was, which I have always given all the study, work, career. Not that she was not dedicated to her job, on the contrary: she liked what she did, she dreamed of becoming a hotel manager. But he put happiness first. Then, being an extremely kind soul, the happiness of others always came before hers. So, for example, when he discovered he was pregnant with Thiago, he put him first. And when he discovered that Impigniello translated her, she went to meet her lover, embraced her. Sensitive to the end ».
For five years Giulia had lived in another city, Milan. Do you feel often?
«Yes, we were tied. I believe that the best way to describe our relationship is a metaphor that I love to remember: she was the tulip and I the vase. I apparently very hard, but fundamental support, because a flower without a vase could not be on a table. Giulia gave our relationship many nuances, with colors, perfumes and her delicacy. There is no experience in our life that we have done without the participation of the other. Even just for the simple desire to share. When we lived far away – and it was so for several years – there has always been a constant communication, if not at least weekly daily. We told us what had happened to us, or simply one listened to how the life of the other flowed ».
So, did you know about the problems with Impignatiello?
«When Giulia disappeared, I never thought he could have killed her. I thought my sister had felt the need to get away for a while, to reflect. I was looking for her alive. I went around putting the signs – I also put them under his house, the one where he was massacred – and in the meantime I had also booked the tickets for her to see the Napoli game. Dad, on the other hand, immediately understood that he was dead. He said: “My daughter would never have moved away. At least a phone call would have done it.” Losing her changed me, I don’t trust people anymore, especially strangers. After the funeral I returned to Genoa, where I lived alone. A neighbor I had never seen knocked on my door, I armored myself inside. However, they also changed positively ».
As?
«I let my sister’s influence change my way of being, I tried to absorb her sensitivity, the same that before it was a reason for comparison between us. I did it to give another clarity to the things I do, but also to hear it closer, like a part of me. I tend more and more to smooth some corners of my character. Some things that I would have taken from chest before, now I try to understand them. Before I was very stubborn, now I try to listen more to the others. And even if I know that from a rational point of view it is not possible, sometimes I have the impression that Giulia is here next to me. It happened, for example, a few months ago: I was writing a research project for an important European Union competition. I was convinced that I wouldn’t have made it, because the selection was hard. But the day I sent it, I found a ladybug on a tent. I had never seen one in my house. I thought: “This is Giulia who wants to tell me something.” In the end I won the prize ».
Source: Vanity Fair
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