The physical changes the body goes through as the years pass can also mean less intensity in sex during middle age and later years. But these are not the only changes that occur with age: as time passes, you also develop greater confidence, better communication skills, fewer inhibitions and this new emotional maturity can also help create a richer, more sexual experience. nuanced and ultimately very satisfying.
According to the experts of Harvard Medical School, it is possible to realize the full potential of sex, even in old age, by understanding the crucial physical and emotional elements that underlie satisfying sex. In particular, you may be able to solve small sexual problems simply by making some changes to your way of making love. Here are some ideas.
Get informed and explore the issues further
On the Internet, on the most authoritative medical sites, there are many self-help materials available for every type of sexual problem. By browsing, you can find insights that apply to your case as a couple, so that you can better inform yourself about a given problem. If talking to each other directly is too difficult, you can underline the passages you like together and show them to each other.
Give yourself time
As one ages, one's sexual responses slow down. You and your partner can increase your chances of success by finding a quiet, comfortable, and uninterrupted environment for sex. Also, it's good to know that physical changes in your body mean you will need more time to get aroused and reach orgasm.
Use lubricants
Vaginal dryness that begins in perimenopause can often be easily corrected with lubricating liquids and gels. Using them freely will help avoid painful sexual intercourse, a problem that can degenerate into a decline in libido and growing relationship tensions. When lubricants no longer work, you should discuss other options with your doctor.
Don't neglect gestures of affection
Even if you are tired, tense or angry, kissing and exchanging affectionate gestures is essential to keeping the bond solid from an emotional and physical point of view.
Practice in the tactile sphere
Sensory focus techniques used by sex therapists can help re-establish physical intimacy without feeling pressured. Many self-help books and instructional videos offer guidance on this topic. You can also ask your partner to be touched the way he or she would like to be touched. This will give a better idea of ​​how much pressure you should use, from gentle to firm.
Try different positions
Developing a repertoire of different sexual positions not only adds interest to sexual intercourse, but can also help overcome problems. Increased stimulation of the CUV point – which occurs when a man penetrates his partner from behind – can help a woman achieve orgasm.
Write down your fantasies
This exercise can help you explore possible activities that foster mutual arousal. Try to think of an experience or film that moved you and then share your memory with each other. This is especially useful for people with low desire.
Do Kegel exercises
Both men and women can improve their sexual fitness by exercising their pelvic floor muscles. To perform these exercises, simply contract the muscle used to stop urine during the flow, holding it contracted for two or three seconds and then releasing. To be repeated 10 consecutive times, trying to do five sets a day. These are exercises that can be performed anywhere: while driving, sitting at your desk or standing in line at the checkout. At home, women can use vaginal weights to increase muscle endurance.
To chill out
Do something relaxing together before having sex, like playing games or going out for a nice dinner. Or try relaxation techniques such as deep breathing exercises or yoga.
Yes to the vibrator
Some sex toys can help women learn about their sexual response, allowing them to show their partner what they like best.
Never give up
If no matter what effort you make, nothing seems to work, you shouldn't give up hope. Your doctor can often determine the cause of a sexual problem and may be able to identify effective treatments. Considering a sex therapist can also help you explore issues that may be getting in the way of a fulfilling sex life.
Source: Vanity Fair

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