This article is published in number 16 of Vanity Fair on newsstands until April 19, 2022
“I am shamelessly happy.” Ilaria Spada he says it like this, without restraint, while looking out of the window at the Madonnina di Monte Mario in Rome. He says it at the beginning of a new life, that of Leawhich made it at the end of February mom for the third timeand at the dawn of another comedy, the bittersweet The idols of women by Eros Puglielli and Lillo and Greg, which brings her closer to thirty roles between cinema and fiction, Italian laughter and great television productions.
Spada has recently been 41 – of which the last eleven have passed alongside Kim Rossi Stuart -, the calmness of a Zen master and the sensitivity of one who could hold a stake in the heart. We tell him: he laughs, and it’s a real laugh. “I have the feeling that my body can’t contain all this happiness.” The morning chat had started instead fromyet another sleepless night: «The baby doesn’t let me sleep much. After all, with her brothers (Ettore, ten years old, and Ian Maria, almost threeed) it was the same thing “.
How is the division of duties in the family? Is Kim supportive?
«My husband and I are complementary: where one does not arrive, the other takes over. Always with a certain amount of improvisation ».
And we who thought it was calm because it was organized!
«For friends and acquaintances, I stay the crazy one, like the forgetful little fish Dory. This is the image they have of me. Maybe I forget to reply to a message, to call back: it’s just that I don’t have a good relationship with technology. In addition, home is a den and the mobile phone an intruder ».
She’s been struggling with an image that doesn’t match her for a while.
“I understood that my path was perfect, because it brought me here”.
Brief summary for those who were distracted: participated in Miss Italy and to the selections of Tissuesdanced to Hi Darwin it’s at Freebetween a sexy shot and a photo at parties in the gossip newspapers.
“All programs for families. But I was sorry to use femininity to please the male viewer, an issue that still warms me a lot. There is nothing wrong with a beautiful body, but when it is exploited I am not there: I remember feeling discomfort then, despite having considered it part of the game … I was young, I was starting to discover the world … To my niece, a splendid twelve-year-old, I always say not to chase satisfaction, not to rely on the gaze of others to feel right and not to make mistakes that in reality will affect more than you imagine “.
What was she like at that age?
«A tomboy: I wore pants with pockets, tank tops and“ surfer ”shoes. I went to the school considered in my part to be the emblem of communism, but I had friends on the left, on the right, in the center … ».
Photo Signe Vilstrup, Simone Guidarelli service
What do you think if you see a photo of yourself from 2002 running the Zecchino d’Oro?
“I think that until that day, in Bologna, I was convinced that I didn’t like children and that I wasn’t able to communicate with them. I have always been the little one of the house, pampered and spoiled: I had never found myself in the position of having to look after. But there I said: “Stop everyone, I’m fine with the children. With children and madmen! ”».
Are you implying that the actors are crazy?
“But no (laughsed)! “
Its crazier side?
“I watch people closely, very closely, and listen to other people’s conversations in a way that, well, might arouse some suspicion or be deemed intrusive. Then, I write down everything on my diaries: stories, suggestions, details … which come in handy when I have to enrich characters with little character. And who knows, soon, they won’t inspire me with a script! I often see films or series that seem to have drawn from my notes ».
So, we can imagine: she writes, the husband turns, and then, maybe, you act together?
«The advantage of sharing the same profession! In any case, yes, it is a desire that exists ».
Can she be a satisfied actress?
«I started dancing, but only because I wanted to put to good use what I have been studying for 14 years. Today I do the job I like and I am immensely grateful. Of course, there are still many things that I miss ».
Several badass roles – can we tell? -: do you never want a serious character?
“Maybe! I’d really like to. Then, however, there is my son Ettore, the only age I can have an exchange with, who keeps repeating: “Mom, yours is a beautiful job, you make people laugh!”. He loves being on set, he is passionate. He wants to become a director, screenwriter, writer … he wants to become everything! ».
How do you react?
«I’m happy, but I would like you to learn to pay attention to dreams: they are not always the best place we could be. Often they are an escape from a fear, which in turn must be studied well ».
Have you ever faced the career or motherhood dilemma?
“Yes, because I love being with my children. Since they’ve been around, time runs fast and I don’t want to miss anything. I always say that it is as if I had three only children because of the attention I give to each one. In any case, for now I continue to feel a certain harmony between being a mother, or rather no, first of all a wife, a mother and then an actress ».
And in fact we see her at the cinema with The idols of women.
«I’m Maria, Joaquim’s wife, played by Corrado Guzzanti, which makes us imagine the level of comedy. We are two Colombian drug traffickers. Ours is a current ménage: I let him believe he has everything in his hand ».
It is not his first time with Lillosuper star of Lol.
“We met on the set of Monstrous family, where we were a very forced couple from Rome. There he came up with the idea of this new character of mine: over the top and excessively dressed, he repeated to me that I didn’t look Italian; then, I began to speak to him in Spanish with a Colombian cadence, like a dear friend of mine ».
Who are, apart from metaphor, the idols of women?
“They are our worst enemies: for example, a husband at any cost, for whom we compromise with our nature.”
However, it is a bit inevitable to compromise …
“To love implies dying to a part of oneself, as long as it is not a part that defines us.”
Talk like a love guru.
“I am introspective and used to asking myself big questions from an early age. When I was studying Philosophy with my father, for example, we ended up off topic because of my curiosity ».
What is the secret of a relationship that flies high?
«Never look for a comfortable man, better one similar but open to comparison and pruning: a good companion, more or less consciously, helps to eliminate dry branches, useless stiffness. With each cut of Kim, I improve, I evolve ».
So, is he a good “gardener”?
“It is! We got married late: we had been together for seven years and we already had a wonderful son. We could also continue like this. Instead it was nice to choose us forever in the light of everything we went through, between important pruning and moments that can divide “.
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Source: Vanity Fair

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