We seek it, we crave it, we deny it but let’s admit it: love is at the center of our lives. For better or for worse it fills our days, sweetening them or poisoning them. Nobody excluded. Neither Megan Foxstatuesque American model and actress.
On the presentation tour of his book of poems Pretty Boys are Poisnous, the 37-year-old would have confided that she was “addicted to love”. In her twenties she fell in love with every co-star in the films she made. She was as if in the grip of the so-called love addiction.
Today we often talk about emotional dependence, that is, when with the other person with whom we share a relationship (sentimental but also family) there is an unbalanced and, ultimately, unhealthy attachment. Even earlier, however, comes the dependence on the concept of love. The idealization of this feeling.
But this really exists love addiction that leads people to incessantly seek love and abandon themselves to this feeling without fear and without protection? We asked these questions to the professor Antonino Tamburellopsychiatrist and psychotherapist, founder ofSkinne Instituteking of social media thanks to his videos with psychology pills. And if William Sheakespeare defined love as the wisest of follies, Tamburello does not move far from such an ancient and yet primordial definition of the concept of love.
Professor Tamburello but what is it? the addiction to falling in lovethat is, the addiction to falling in love?
«The human community shares the same need: intense nourishment for the soul. You can’t stay in the pond. Readers may have seen the film Neverending Story, it’s a masterpiece. There is a white horse that can’t get out of the pond. Well, man can’t even fit in there. Even if we make mistakes, even if we delude ourselves, we all need a dream of love. Indeed we must hope for love. Stopping hope is a profound mistake. Stranding is stasis, refusal. Megan Fox simply didn’t beach herself. She lived and participated in her existence.”
So calling it a pathology is wrong?
“Yes. Defining it as a pathology risks infecting people, do you hear that serious word? Better to delude yourself and be disillusioned than not delude yourself at all. And she was a person who lived. She replied. She didn’t shield herself and she didn’t put herself behind a wall. Walls shouldn’t be there. There may be a bit of protective instinct, a clarity of evaluation, but without walls.”
So it’s less healthy to remain cynical…
«It is healthy to trust, to live without protection without being afraid of the natural pain that comes from disappointments. Disappointment is the most normal and natural thing in this world. And then our soul doesn’t need protection because it is superior. Only we can surround it with an unsuitable environment with wrong words and beliefs. Antonino, for example, lived unconsciously, like a child who doesn’t do calculations. I don’t want to protect myself.
Like Megan Fox…
«But yes. This girl, like everyone else, needed the hope, well-being, relief and adrenaline that love gives us. Human beings don’t seem to know how convenient and perfect it is to respect and put oneself at service. The word ‘service’ comes from the Greek, therapon, servant, the root of therapy. But service is not a negative word, a father also puts himself at the service of his son. Service and gift are interwoven as concepts. In fact, as soon as she experienced a beautiful love story she had three daughters and was “cured”. Who was the architect of this healing? The love”.
Does true love cure?
«When true love arrives, everything that was there before, even if disappointing, becomes healthy because it took us there. And what do we do, erase our entire history? We must live it and hope against all hope, like Abraham. Always open and never closed or cynical. We must not be defeatists. Also because it is difficult to give up what is indispensable.”
What is the problem with this rejection of love, expectations that are too high?
«The soul is in search of perfection and the opposite is not possible: we have an internal knowledge of the perfect model. Only a false sage would tell you to scale back your expectations. You can’t do it. The inclination to the search for perfection, and therefore for real love, cannot be reduced. When you meet someone who loves you and never goes away. We have this mold inside us.”
One last question: what if this search for love is driven by the fear of being alone?
«When the engine that drives illusion is driven by fear, the departure is conditioned, mortgaged. The fear of being alone is also wrong, as is the fear of opening up to love. This fear is an inevitable consequence of those who misunderstand the mystery of the soul’s perfection. Most people aspire to love but it can live within us, in a single soul in an equally shining, glittering and exaggerated way. It can nourish us and others even if we are not reciprocated. The single soul can harbor a love even without having proof of its lovability, even without reciprocation or recognition of the other.”
Source: Vanity Fair
I’m Susan Karen, a professional writer and editor at World Stock Market. I specialize in Entertainment news, writing stories that keep readers informed on all the latest developments in the industry. With over five years of experience in creating engaging content and copywriting for various media outlets, I have grown to become an invaluable asset to any team.