Simone’s dream: autistic, he conquers the public with his song

“To others I am not who I am, I am who I seem.” For years, Simone Maghernino, 22-year-old autistic from San Severo, province of Foggia, lived in a “cloak of solitude”. Which he has chosen to compensate with personal activities and interests. Among them, music has become his most precious friend. The one that led him to record a single – which is available on Spotify, Apple Music and Amazon – and to make it known, singing, in front of an excited audience, on many, different stages.

His debut song is called “Ali in your pocket” and it was written by his mother, Luisa Sordillo, who was able to tell, beyond “rash eyes that point the finger, that raise walls and then lower their gazes”, who Simone really is. «A boy who dreams, who wants to do, to stay. He wants to be. To live the life that was given to me. With your head held high, yes, just like you. ”

His mother, who has always believed in him, explains that “autism is a developmental disorder, that is a different path of growth, characterized by an alteration of social interaction, communication and behavior. With falls also in the capacity for abstraction and imagination. It does not therefore manifest itself at birth, but usually by the third year of age. Observing the behavior of these children it is possible to notice manifestations, more or less evident, depending on the greater or lesser impairment of “normal” skillsin the proper sense of arising from the norm, that is, from the majority of cases “.

What are usually the alarm bells?
«One of the first is the absence of verbalism, which Simone did not show, even speaking a little ahead of his twin brother. On the other hand, what Simone had in hindsight was a certain obsessive and repetitive behavior: he switched the lights on and off, opened and closed the doors, turned on himself. I was in my first maternity leave and I had no experience with the autistic condition: I paid no attention to these “oddities”. Growing up, Simone repeated the same questions and had some motor difficulties. The diagnosis came as a shot at age 7, leaving everyone stunned and stunned. It is the moment in which the life of those who receive it explodes and the dreams, expectations and desires built up to that moment are shattered into tiny pieces ».

How did you experience this diagnosis?
«You are never ready to think that your child will not be like the others, especially in a society like ours where, in words, we are all nonconformists, but in fact we keep ourselves well anchored to stereotypes. What therefore frightens and will bring suffering concerns the closure of the world, the walls that rise, the arms that close, the index fingers that point, the eyes that lower. In one word, we find ourselves enveloped in loneliness. At 360 degrees, as the absence of the state and institutions, of the school, of sector operators, of friends and often of family members themselves “.

What are Simone’s peculiarities?
«Simone has always been verbal, even if his language is often thin and certainly devoid of metaphors, idioms, double meanings and irony. Things that escape an autistic mind which, by its nature, is led to a close correspondence to the literal meaning of words. For this same reason Simone is pure, he does not know falsehood and hypocrisy, nor malice. He also has fine motor skills, vocal monotonous and a lot of anxiety, increased with growth and with the awareness of being “different” for others and with the frustration of not having been too often understood and accepted ».

When did you discover your love for music?
«Simone’s passion for music has grown more every day, to the point of pushing him to take an interest in the study of a musical instrument. He has chosen the piano which is helping him a lot also for his motor difficulties. Together we practice every day and then we sing karaoke, having a lot of fun. Seeing him happy and serene makes me happy too. For us “autistic” mothers it is not easy. We are usually the ones who give up their dreams, their jobs, their hobbies, their lives. To start a new one, in two. Always hand in hand with your child. Because it is necessary to fill the gaps in the system and therefore it is necessary to become teachers, therapists, speech therapists, nurses, carers, playmates. Not to mention the sleepless nights for the disturbing question after us. The downside is that a new door opens, with a new horizon and new bridges that lead to knowing many things that, in “normality”, there would have been no time, desire and interest to discover. With my son and thanks to him my baggage is richer and more varied, even though it is not what I had imagined and that I had prepared for my trip ».

How did the collaboration between Simone and the singer-songwriter Ilario De Angelis, who wrote the music, start?
«Simone, like all children, wanted to play sports. But unfortunately I knocked on various doors which were promptly closed in my face. I landed at Ilario de Angelis’ fitness family gym and finally not only did the door open, but I found a smile and welcoming arms. Simone was nine years old and with him he began an individual psychomotor path that later ended up on a fitness path together with all the others. Ilario demonstrated how, with love, curiosity, study and organization, it is possible to acquire the necessary preparation and competence to work peacefully with autistic children, establishing an equal relationship with them of perfect integration and inclusion ».

How did you go from sport to music?
«In addition to being a physical education teacher, Ilario is a good songwriter. On the other hand, I like to write and I often deal with autism and disability. In fact, I have published a novel, “Voce di sale”, by Iacobelli publisher, which I like to define as the pindaric flight of my autistic experience. So, combining our two passions, I wrote down a text on diversity and Ilario set it to music. The choice of the singer, although later, was natural. Simone was necessarily the truest interpreter. Thanks to Ilario’s experience we turned to the arranger Edgardo Caputo of Edrecords of San Severo who immediately accepted our challenge, opening his recording room and welcoming Simone with grace, affection and attention ».

What has changed for Simone since then?
“Above all, the approach of others. Simone is now there, he is greeted, embraced, applauded. Simone was born a second time, moving from the corner where he had been relegated and regaining a center. He now he feels alive, well received, considered. He has new goals and above all new dreams. And certainly new confidence in the possibility of making them happen. He again has a colorful future waiting for him and definitely a newfound self-esteem. He has taken his crumpled wings out of his pocket and is flying, free and happy in the sky of his life. “

Could he have imagined reaching similar goals?
“Honestly, I never thought about singing. It was not built at the table, nor was it ever budgeted for. It was born spontaneously, like all the most beautiful things. But I have always believed in the possibilities and potential of my son. His times are different, the ways of learning are sometimes different, but the desire, the curiosity, the enthusiasm, the passion are typical of any 22-year-old boy. I know who he is, beyond what he may appear to be ».

What would you say to the new mother of an autistic child who is scared about her child’s future?
“To arm oneself with patience, courage and will because it is not easy to have to fight for the recognition of the rights of one’s children in a society that still struggles to recognize the differences on an equal position. There is still the misconception that the model conforming to the scheme is the best, the right, the only one. But I would like to tell these mothers never to give up because disability is absolutely not the absence of skills. Of course it is more difficult, but life should not be a race but a journey and the more you hold hands, the further you can go. Everyone, without leaving anyone behind. Simone, with her song, has shown that you can break prejudices, go beyond the walls of indifference, excite while remaining yourself. It is a great lesson that she has given to me and to others. A ransom for all autistic kids who have wings in their pockets that they still can’t use. Let’s leave room for everyone’s flights, the horizon will open up and it will be more beautiful ».

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