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The shitty roommate: how to recognize him

Living together with this mythological figure who is the shitty roommate can be a real nightmare.

Here are the characteristics to identify it, if then these are combined … good luck!

It never cleans

The first, unmistakable sign of the shitty roommate is his total aversion to hygiene. Leave dishes and pots in the sink for days, regardless of food residues that become encrusted. She leaves hair and hair in the shower, so much that it makes you doubt that you are living with her cousin Itt. You’ve never seen him with a sponge in his hand and she probably doesn’t even know there’s a vacuum cleaner in the house. Attached to the fridge is the sheet with the cleaning shifts, but he completely ignores it.

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Don’t throw out the garbage

Perhaps he is convinced that the bins empty themselves by magic, not even we were in Harry Potter, or they just don’t care that someone else always takes care of it. The fact is that the shitty roommate never bothered to throw a single bag, not even one. The real tragedy occurs when he is alone for a few days: upon your return, you will find the house overrun with stinking garbage and new forms of life.

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Make your things disappear

The shitty roommate would rather die than share something with the other inhabitants of the house; rather, if he could, he would close his cupboard with a bolt and a padlock. Unfortunately for you, his philosophy is not valid in reverse and he has no qualms about cheating your things, believing himself so smart as not to be discovered.. But if the packs of pasta empty too quickly, there are only two solutions: either he did it or you are sleepwalking and you cook spaghetti carbonara while you sleep.

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It does not contribute to expenses

Staying on the subject of stinginess, the shitty roommate never pulls out a euro. Whether it’s the gas bill or the purchase of toilet paper, always let someone else pay, and then promptly “forget” to pay their share, despite being repeatedly pointed out to him. Unlike the Lannisters, he never pays his debts.

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It continually disturbs

Completely regardless of the fact that other people live in the house, the shitty roommate never misses an opportunity to make a mess. In broad daylight, while you are studying, turn the music blaring (and it is almost always music of dubious taste, as if that weren’t enough) or video call the whole family (strictly without earphones). In the evening he invites harassing and rude people as much as he does, which prevents you from dining in peace. Not to mention when he comes home at three in the morning, waking up to his hippo movements. In cases like this, murder is justified, isn’t it?

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Source: Vanity Fair

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