Laura and her husband Manuel decided to follow the assisted fertilization process to expand their family and become parents. They succeeded after several attempts between Italy and Dubai, the country where they moved for work and where for the first time they heard their baby’s heartbeat.
Then, everything fell apart. “On the second ultrasound we discovered that our Olivia had a serious malformation”, Laura tells us, still with the pain of a very difficult decision. «The malformation of our child is called omphalocele: between the tenth and the twelfth week the navel does not close and the organs develop externally. In Olivia’s case the situation was very serious because several organs had already grown externally ».
At that moment they had to take the most contested decision. “There we not only had a team available to explain what the procedure would be, but we also received fundamental psychological support. Those who, like us, have undergone a PMA (medically assisted procreation) know what it means to want a baby and decide to terminate the pregnancy is not what you want to do. So you run into certain thoughts and emotions. Fortunately we found a midwife who was an angel for us ».
In addition to the pain, Laura and Manuel have had to deal with the barriers of unprepared hospitals in Italy, the too easy judgment and the prejudice of those who still believe that abortion is a convenient choice.
“When we called to Italy I was baffled by the answers: “I don’t know how to help you”, “It should come through the NHS so it can fit into the statistics”, “You can’t have an abortion”. At that point my husband activated and we found a clinic in Switzerland that gave us all the support we needed ».
In Italy, the voluntary termination of pregnancy is guaranteed by the Law 194 of 1978 but even today, access for women is complex. After the first trimester, abortion is allowed only in cases where a doctor detects and certifies that the pregnancy constitutes a serious danger to the woman’s life or to her physical or mental health (for example: due to di severe genetic anomalies and / or malformations of the embryo or fetus, or due to serious maternal pathologies such as tumors or psychiatric pathologies).
“Shortly before the surgery, my husband and I promised each other that we would never forget Olivia but above all that we would talk about it, because when it happened we found ourselves in front of a wall, talking about it and finding information seemed impossible. Abortion is not an act of selfishness but of extreme love, we already behave like parents, putting aside our dreams, desires for the good of the child. And it goes on ».
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Other stories of Vanity Fair that may interest you:
-The right denied: investigation into abortion in Italy
– Let’s face it
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